This theme offers all kinds of opportunities for you to look at how your perception, values, habits and attachments affect your daily activities.
Take time to read the Opening Story and use the questions below as a trigger for your own storytelling session with your Mindful Transition partner or as a topic for reflection or journal writing.
Opening Story:
I keep a fossil on my desk at all times.
Whenever I feel rushed or find myself creating a sense of urgency, I pick up the fossil and caress its polished surface. It's over 200 million years old. Suddenly, returning that phone call or meeting that self-imposed deadline doesn't seem nearly as critical.
My ancient arthropod reminds me that, in the scheme of things, this moment is both indescribably insignificant and full of potential for awareness.
I find that remarkably comforting.
True story: I brought the fossil with me as a sort of visual aid for a presentation I was giving on sustainability at Intel. As I opened the car door in the Intel parking lot, the fossil slipped out of my bag. It crashed to the pavement, the asphalt shattering the tip of my favorite piece of history. I'm trying hard to avoid seeing any deep meaning in that disturbing little incident.
We use time. It allows us to keep things organized, both in our day planners and in our minds. It's a helpful ordering mechanism.
We can divide periods of living into convenient packages—that wondrous year in Miss Green's first grade class, the bust-your-butt blur of that first tough job, the years in the old house on Birch Street, and on and on. You've got your own compartments.
It's hard to get a grip on the enormity of time when we view it in terms of appointments, lunch hours, and television time-slots. If we pull waaayyy back and look at it, then life becomes a function of time instead of the other way around.
We don't tend to pay attention to any of that while getting ready for work in the morning. We don’t think much about Time with a capital T. That's because we're looking through the lens of the microscope. Well, haul out the telescope.
Take a look at gigantic periods of Time. Consider unfathomable chunks of eternity.
How does this change the way you feel about this moment?
Get your own fossil--or even just a rock--and pick it up when you're feeling frazzled. See if contemplating Time with a capital T can help you relax and see how this moment fits into the big picture.
Share Your Story:
 Remember a moment during which you felt awed by time. Where were you? What were you doing? What triggered your sense of the enormity of time? How did it make you feel about THAT moment?
|
Now, take a look at the list of questions below.
Read each one, and simply watch your reaction to it.
Does it resonate? Do you feel a flicker of recognition that this is something you have struggled with? At any point do you feel a temptation to jump into giving an answer in order to express your particular view?
Watch for those, and dig deeper. If you react, it means you’ve got some interesting things to discover there!
1) Would you describe yourself as a morning person or a night person? Are you proud of that designation? Would you rather be the opposite?
What are the advantages/disadvantages of being a morning person? A night person?
Do you feel it is possible to change your natural sleep patterns and peak times of alertness? How would you attempt to do that?
What would be lost if you were to change your typical sleep habits? What would be gained?
If you were to change your peak time, what one activity do you think you might add that would take advantage of the change?
Are you likely to feel that you need more sleep than you are currently getting or less sleep than you are currently getting?
Do you ever take naps? How do you feel when you do take a nap?
What would be your optimum time to do so? What is the perfect amount of time for a nap?
2) Would you describe yourself as a punctual person or as someone who is more likely to be late?
How do you feel when you are late to an appointment?
Do you ever show up for an appointment much earlier than necessary?
Do you ever “kill time” waiting for an appointment because you have arrived early?
What is your opinion of those who are chronically late?
What is your opinion of those who are consistently early?
Are you likely to confront someone who makes you wait for them?
If you had to choose to be either fifteen minutes early or fifteen minutes late to a casual lunch with friends, which would you be most likely to select?
3) Do you work overtime?
Are you likely to skip your lunch or break in order to get more work done?
Do you ever go in to work early in order to accomplish more—even if you are not paid for that extra time?
Are you more likely to go early or to stay late?
What is your opinion of those who come to work ten minutes late every day? Of those who work ten minutes later at the end of every day?
Do you feel guilty if you are the first one to leave at the end of the day while others stay longer to get more done?
Do you feel proud or smug if you are the first one to show up for work before others arrive?
Do you ever avoid meetings because you are not prepared?
Do you ever make excuses for the fact that you are behind schedule?
Do you think of yourself as someone who is organized?
Are you likely to judge others who are not able to get their work done or show up to scheduled meetings without being properly prepared?
Which is likely to make you most uncomfortable: showing up at a meeting unprepared or not showing up at all?
4) Do you commute to work or school?
If so, how consistent is your commute time?
Are there factors—traffic jams, weather conditions—that frequently cause you to be late to work or school?
If so, do you find it easier to deal with out-of-my-hands reasons for being late than if you had simply overslept?
Are you likely to get stressed when you see that you will be late?
Have you ever made an excuse about traffic or weather when in fact you were simply late getting up in the morning?
Do you do anything during your commute that is likely to help you remain calm (listen to music, books on tape, reading, etc.)?
Have you ever justified your lengthy commute by telling others that it is positive (gives you time to unwind, learn a language using a CD, listen to the news, talk to family on your cell phone, etc.)?
Do you talk on your cell phone during your commute?
If so, are you more likely to talk to friends and family or are you likely to get a head start on your work day by calling colleagues and clients before you reach your office or school?
Do you feel a need to “use” your commute time wisely? What kinds of activities make you feel that you are doing so?
Share Your Story:
Remember a time during which you were running late for an appointment and experienced a shift--you decided you couldn't do anything to get there earlier and instead of stressing, just relaxed. What prompted the shift--a sense of helplessness or a sense of power? How did you feel when you walked in late?
5) If you had an extra hour during the day, how would you spend it? Are you more likely to use that time to get things done or to do something that relaxes or inspires you?
What part of your daily routine makes you feel locked in?
When you wake up in the morning, can you fairly accurately guess what you will be doing at every hour during the day?
How much freedom do you feel you have to make changes in your routine?
How likely are you to make changes simply to see how it feels?
6) How much of your free time is spent with others?
Would you prefer to increase or decrease this amount of time?
If you would rather spend more time alone, what would you choose to do?
If you would rather spend more time with others, how would you choose to spend that time?
How important is it to you to have a relaxing evening at home?
A relaxing weekend with nothing scheduled?
On average, how many evenings a week would you like to spend “out” with friends or family and how many evenings a week would you like to spend at home with friends or family?
Do you ever feel guilty for not spending more time with your loved ones? If so, how do you justify this time (making more money, need time for myself, nobody is home anyway, etc.)?
7) Do you often feel that time is flying?
What are you most likely to be doing when you feel that you are able to lose track of time?
When you look at the last five years, are you more likely to feel that time has passed quickly or that so much has happened it’s hard to believe it has been only five years?
When you look ahead to the next five years, are you more likely to feel that you cannot predict what your life will look like or that you can clearly see it? How does this make you feel?
How often do you consider making big changes in your life?
How likely are you to think about the future in terms of your finances?
In terms of your dreams? In terms of your health?
What events in your life have been most unexpected?
How did those events change the direction of your life later?
Are you more likely to separate your life into stages based on where you lived, what you were doing, or who you were with?
Share Your Story:
How important is it to you to document time or celebrate milestones?
How do you prefer to remember events in your life--by keeping a scrapbook, photo album, journal, or home videos/DVDs? By gathering loved ones on special occasions? Do you have any traditions such as an annual party on New Year's, a first-day-of-school photo session with your kids, or another event that draws attention to the progression of time?
Share a story about an event you USED to celebrate but no longer acknowledge. What moments of your life right now are likely to become your happiest memories in twenty years?
Read, watch, ponder, discuss.
Enjoy the process of digging deeper, and take a look at any knee-jerk reactions or tendencies to justify or explain your position. How might you shift your energy and ideas to reflect more openness? What would it feel like to have fewer "shoulds" in your life? How can you recreate your relationship with time in order to gain more insight, joy and meaning in your daily life?
